Archive for Coaching

Six Ways to Shine 5 #ChangeYourChannel

ChangeYourChannel
Imagine if you could change the channel within yourself like you change it when watching the TV, looking for something more fulfilling or fun to get absorbed in? Imagine if you could even choose in advance rather than as a reaction to something you didn’t like?!

Well the good news is….and this might sound a bit odd until you understand the science, but as human beings we can choose our state of being through using the right tools and techniques. We can choose to change channel. And the even better news is, that with a little training, we can entrain our inner systems, our inner environments created by neural patterns which then create physiological patterns. Yes we can train ourselves to such a degree that our inner environments sort of ramp up the scale, week by week nudging up our inner default setting so it can move upwards on the barometer, towards a new and improving level of greater happiness, satisfaction, fulfilment, gratitude, peace, joy, love and freedom.

I’ve been using meditation style techniques like this for four years now, and in practical terms what it means is this. I know my inner state is not just a conditioned reaction to my outer world, i.e, ’things are going well’. When life is going great, we actually have no real clue as to how resourceful we are, or how resilient and anchored our inner feeling of security and empowerment is. When everything is hunky-dory we just cannot test the power of our inner state in the face of adversity, because all our external boxes are getting ticked.

However, when life is throwing you a smorgasbord of set-backs, a medley of messiness, and a daily dose of dilemma – you know, the way REAL life does – at this point when you are able to acknowledge and honour what’s happening, when you are able to lean into it instead of by-pass the mess, when you are able to calmly focus on what needs to be done and and making the best decision within an imperfect and complicated situation…. AND you can also settle into an inner state of peace, loving acceptance and creative fluidity AT THE SAME TIME – then you know you have mastered the art and the science of changing your channel.

I face many tests in my life, but I have reached the point where I’m able to remain calm, creative, connected and resourceful throughout, and I don’t have to turn to distractions or to self medicate to soothe the soreness. It’s through my own personal transformation and knowing what is possible for us all (because believe me I didn’t used to be this way! But that’s a story for another day…) that I felt genuinely inspired to share what I’d learned and create something for my clients which was a highly effective and reliable amalgamation of the resources I’d gathered over the years. That’s how The SHINE Program was born, and I designed it to form a delicious daily practice, so that whilst you’re training your brain, and learning to #ChangeYourChannel – it feels good! If it feels good, and you ‘get it’ you are going to stick with it and receive all the beautiful longer term benefits further down the line.

As I was researching and studying, I became increasingly interested in the cutting edge science of the electro-magnetic field of our hearts, and of the enormous power and output of our hearts as energy centres within the body. It was as a result of this work that I designed SHINE Meditation which you receive within The SHINE Program, as a heart centred meditation. The science on this subject is growing, bringing facts and figures to marry up with the ancient and handed down wisdom of many meditation traditions. I LOVE it when science catches up like that!!

Below you can see the image which represents the measurable energy field of our hearts, and you can see how fields of energy overlap and interconnect. What I found fascinating was that changing our inner state, changing our channel, actually then changes what we’re broadcasting outwards energetically to others and to our environments. Our heart output is 5000 times more powerful than our brain output, and when we are radiating love, peace, gratitude, compassion and joy in our inner environment, we are also sending these messages outwards through specific frequencies and electro-magnetic wave patterns through our heart fields. The wonderful news is, we can influence and lift others through our own powerful channel of choice. And interestingly, when we choose these high vibe channels, because we are like human tuning forks, we will resonate with even more of these like frequencies externally (remember tuning forks resonating in physics and getting REALLY loud when two like frequencies blend together?!) which means through changing our own channel we are raising the vibration around us too.

Electro magnet

Even more fascinating, is that our hearts also act like information processing centres, both broadcasting and receiving energetic information to and from our environments, so the channel we choose even starts to form a perceptual filter THROUGH which we perceive the world. This explains exactly why it’s possible to experience love, joy and gratitude in times of challenge and dilemma – it’s because we are receiving information and perceiving it through the channel of a higher state.

I have designed SHINE in such a simple, practical and step by step way, that all of this training is made easy for you. All you have to do is watch a few video tutorials, and take advantage of the four guided meditation audios and you will have all you need to build your own routine which suits you.

I am currently offering my SHINE program for a special #FabulousFebruary offer. For just £87 you can access your own SHINE Program here…. #GetReadyToShine and #ChangeYourChannel here:
https://lisabardellcoaching.leadpages.co/shine-program/

Lisa Bardell – BSc (Hons) Psych, Diploma in Clinical Hypnotherapy, Coaching & NLP Master – is a coach and therapist who retrained to follow her passion into Psychology after a 16 year business career at executive level. Lisa runs two busy practices in Cheshire and London and works with coaching clients all over the world via Skype. For a FREE 30 min consultation mail on info@lisabardellcoaching.co.uk

Six Ways to Shine 1 #GetInFlow

 

GetInFlow

We hear so much casual talk of flow. Everybody wants more of it. But what the heck is it? And more importantly how can you get it for yourself?

Most people find that their flow comes when ‘life’ goes well, but goes again as soon as some challenges crop up. Well you don’t need me to tell you that you’re probably not going to shine your brightest light out into the world if you only have access to fleeting, fair weather flow.

As with most words which appear in the world of personal development, flow is more than just a metaphor. It’s a real thing. There is a science to flow. The power of your flow, the longevity of your flow, and how quickly you can return to flow is a scientifically measurable phenomena, with real results, and tangible benefits for the flow-er!

The good news is you can totally train yourself into the state of flow, and you can consciously choose to return to flow when you realise you’ve lost it.

But what is flow specifically? How would you know if you were in flow? And what’s the big deal with it?

Flow is measured through the variance of the spaces in between your heartbeats. It’s not your heart rate, that only gives you half the story. Your heart rate can be fast or slow but that won’t tell you if you’re in flow.

fullsizeoutput_35ed

Flow doesn’t even mean that your heart beats are evenly spaced (that’s not natural, it’s not how hearts work). What it does mean, is that if you plotted a graph of your heart beats they would be getting faster. And then slower. And faster again. But this graph would be a smooth and even wavy line.

The proper term for what is measured when we are in flow, is called Psychophysiological Coherence. It means all the body’s systems are energetically coordinated, in harmony, fluidly communicating fully and optimally with each other.

When we are in heart coherence aka in flow, we are in the most energy efficient state possible. Mind, body and emotions are all in sync.

Flow comes with SO many benefits you will wonder how you ever got on without it!

If you imagine in your body there is a store cupboard of ingredients, and from those same ingredients your body can produce two different recipes. The flow recipe is what we produce when we are in heart coherence. From the parent hormone pregnenalone, we produce the wonder hormone called DHEA. This is all about health, anti aging and vitality!

However, there’s also a rather toxic recipe the body can make from the same stores of pregnenalone, and that is the stress hormone cortisol. Cortisol is the no-flow hormone that causes us to age, get sick, store fat and gain weight by slowing our metabolism. It also erodes the neural connections in the hippocampus area of our brains which makes us lose our memories, lowers our mood and causes erratic emotional outbursts, sensitivity and reactivity.

When we are in the no-flow state we are stressed, fearful, angry, impatient, lacking empathy, distracted, ashamed, guilty or sad.

We also experience a shutting down of our higher cortical functioning which means we lack discernment, are more likely to get addicted or dependent, lose concentration or lack focus on goals for the future, and have a much lower level of self perception and intuitive awareness of others.

The graph of the space between our heart beats would be random and utterly chaotic. Many people are stuck with the no-flow state most of the time, they are anxiety prone and more likely to rely on substances to feed the starved reward centres in their brains with a quick but fleeting fix (nicotine, alcohol, drugs, food, sugar).

Flow = Harmony  No Flow = Chaos

When you’re in flow you will experience more…

  • Emotional stability
  • Emotional awareness – it’s actually easier to honour and observe our true emotional experience through flow, and therefore it’s easier to articulate and express our emotional experience with others
  • Energy
  • High quality rest & sleep
  • Mental sharpness
  • Focus & concentration
  • Access and recall of information and words
  • Creativity & problem solving genius
  • Joy, happiness & bliss!! (even when life deals you a smorgasbord of setbacks, it will not steal your joy or rob you of your resources)
  • Empathy & connection with others
  • Present moment awareness & presence to hold space for people

Discovering flow and training myself into it, was my number one motivation for creating The SHINE Program and helping other people to learn it too. SHINE is all about heart coherence and flow, and within it I have combined the two best and globally recognised techniques for creating flow. I have followed and researched the latest neuroscience and heart science findings to bring you a #GetInFlow method which is so simple and reliable anyone can learn it. You can literally go from no-flow to flow in a matter of weeks. I have proven the results of SHINE through a standardised trial study too, so you can trust that it is tried and tested.

If you would like to learn a simple and highly effective technique for yourself, I have developed a practical program based on modern Applied Psychology and Mind-Body Science, called SHINE – ‘A Daily Meditation, Relaxation & Self-Coaching Technique’ which teaches you to access and
nurture the optimal Brain – Heart – Body state of Psychophysiological Coherence for improved Health, Happiness & Success – SHINE was statistically validated in January 2016 through a standardised trial protocol with 40 people, for its effectiveness and positive results on health, emotional wellbeing, mental wellbeing, stress management and improving productivity.

I want to share SHINE far and wide, and I have a very special #FabulousFebruary offer on to celebrate a re-launch of a fine-tuned version of the original program, my offer is at £20 OFF, for just £87.

For just £87 you can access your own SHINE Program here…. #GetReadyToShine and #GetInFlow here:
https://lisabardellcoaching.leadpages.co/shine-program/

Lisa Bardell – BSc (Hons) Psych, Diploma in Clinical Hypnotherapy, Coaching & NLP Master – is a coach and therapist who retrained to follow her passion into Psychology after a 16 year business career at executive level. Lisa runs two busy practices in Cheshire and London and works with coaching clients all over the world via Skype. For a FREE 30 min consultation mail on info@lisabardellcoaching.co.uk

So you want to be a better leader?

How many of you wish you could spark that magical something to ramp up your leadership style, your career potential or your profile credentials?

Have you been sent on, or enrolled in countless leadership style ‘How To’ type programmes or courses – only to realise you pretty much know the theory anyway?

We can all draw up a list of qualities we believe a good leader must show. In fact many of us could probably write the basic content of a ‘How To’ type workshop ourselves…..BUT something gets in the way doesn’t it? Some deep subconscious clutter, picked up over years of conditioning, comparing and criticism just seems to run the show every now and again and take us off the track of being the sort of leader we think we want to be, should be or need to be

leaders small

Over the past 2 years, since leaving my corporate career to re-design my own life to be more fulfilling, more flexible and more fun, I followed my early passion for Psychology to become a full time Performance Coach. I’ve been working one to one with CEO’s, entrepreneurs, business owners and senior directors to help them perform better in their roles, create more success, and enjoy their lives and relationships more fully.

What I already knew about leadership ( from leading in my own senior director roles ) and what I have learned since from working with other leaders in a coaching capacity, is that there really is just one zone, just one single element to learn and to implement – and from that all those other qualities and attributes just flow freely…..MENTAL CLARITY

Mental Clarity

The ability to access that inner state of Mental Clarity, at will, on demand and ongoing is the ultimate formula for ‘Serenity & Success’.

This is how it works – from a state of ongoing and entrained Mental Clarity, I promise that you simply cannot help but to demonstrate the following ‘deep drivers’ of Leadership:

  • Authenticity
  • Direction
  • Resilience
  • Intuition
  • Wisdom
  • Creativity
  • Presence
  • Connection

And low and behold, a natural by-product of these deep drivers can’t help but flow into these familiar ‘Leadership Attributes’ we are sent to learn ‘How To’ mimic on those courses and programmes:

  • Agility
  • Good Decisions
  • Strategy
  • Innovation
  • Problem Solving
  • Influence
  • Strong Relationships
  • Integrity
  • Passion
  • Purpose
  • Vision

The difference is, from an inner platform of Mental Clarity, we are doing it for real. We can stop thinking about ‘how’ we are supposed to do it, and just get in to our own authentic flow.

Subconscious Clutter

That old subconscious veil of clutter, confusion and doubt was secretly all driven by fear – albeit subtle in some cases – but fear all the same. Muddling through a medley of ‘resistance to what is’ and ‘attachment to what should be’ can be draining, and it certainly gets in the way of inspiring and authentic leadership and of a sense of inner ‘Serenity & Success’.

Serenity & Success Coaching

If you would like to work with me one to one on your performance, your leadership potential or anything else that is getting in the way or you living to your full potential, you can contact me directly.

If you’re interested in attending one of my ‘Serenity & Success Coaching Workshops’ there are Manchester and London dates coming up, all details and ticket links can be found below:

Lisa Bardell is a Performance Master Coach, NLP Master, Accredited Mind CALM Meditation Coach and a Registered Clinical Hypnotherapist working with private clients One to One from her clinics in Cheshire and Central London, and through Corporate Coaching Programmes with businesses in Manchester and London. Her regular schedule of EVENTS, WORKSHOPS & RETREATS can be found on: LISABARDELLCOACHINGLtd.eventbrite.co.uk

 

2017… Planning with pleasure. Goals for goddesses…

If you want to  plan for pleasure you have to plan with pleasure. Welcome to my guide to goals for goddesses… 

 

goals

It will soon be time to wish you all a Happy New Year. You might already be thinking about the year ahead. Maybe you will want to remedy the excesses of Christmas, maybe you want to get fit and stay in shape for the whole year, maybe you’re ready for a lifestyle overhaul, or maybe you want something completely new? – a big change in your life, your income or your career?

Whatever you would like to plan, to action and to enjoy for the New Year and beyond, here are some of my Top Tips for setting, sticking to and achieving your goals for the future, instead of falling half heartedly off track before Spring has even sprung.

You can apply and adapt this strategy to any area of your life, and you can also use it for regular reviews to fine tune your goals and plans on a monthly basis.

#Review 2016

Before starting anything new, it’s always a good idea to review what came before, just the same way you would start your new year business strategy with a review of the previous year’s performance, you can adopt this approach for yourself too.

1/ Begin by Celebrating Your Successes – yes take a moment ( or an hour ) to pat yourself on the back for what went well, where you performed well, where you achieved what you set out to, or where you acted resourcefully in the face of challenges.

One very useful and interesting fact about our brains and emotions, is that when we remember events from the past, and really associate and connect into the feelings, we actually produce the biochemistry of those positive emotions all over again – the brain does not know the difference! – all the neurological pathways of chemical and electrical messages get sent around our whole bodies once more. Connecting in to positive emotional states is always useful!

2/ Next step is to Acknowledge What Didn’t Work – without getting stuck into lamenting mistakes and mishaps! – do this succinctly to allow you to move on to point 3

3/ Now Reflect on what Lessons you have Learnt from the above. Note what you will take forward and use for the future.

4/ Let the rest GO! Yes just set a clear intention to let it go, the least useful thing you can do is to hang on to old emotional clutter. When you carry frustration and resentment forward with you, it shows. And more importantly you unwittingly send it out as an unspoken message. Every emotional state has a vibrational quality to it, and you will be broadcasting out your message, whether you intend to or not! ( if you don’t want to take my word for it, refer to Albert Einstein – more on that later! )

#Start with a Dream

Getting creative is important. When I work with my clients on specific goals, projects or problem solving, I walk them through the ‘Disney Strategy’ ( I won’t cover this in full here ). Walt Disney was a man who knew the power of dreaming, and conjuring up ideas…so much so he built it in to his business strategy. In fact he put so much emphasis on creativity he spent whole days or even weeks intentionally immersed in a creative, fluid mindset which he ensured was unhindered by being too practical, logistical or problem focussed.

So I would encourage you to do the same, here are the rules to adding ‘Dreaming Time’ in to your goal setting success strategy:

1/ Only dreams and ideas are allowed – schedule in your ‘Dreaming Time’, and when you have set the time aside, this time is only for IDEAS. Do not start criticising them, or checking them for practicalities at this stage. Just let the ideas flow, and make a note of them.

2/ Ask yourself this – ‘If I could guarantee it would work out, what would I do?’ – this question can help you start the flow and be more imaginative.

3/ Relax – we are at our most creative in relaxed and slow brainwave states – our brains are constantly sending out electric waves of information to other parts of our brain,  to our bodies, and to the space around ( including other people ). Brain wave frequencies affect out thoughts. The busy brainwave state that we are in most of the time is called Beta, it is fast, analytical and logical – the opposite of what we need for creative thinking! To help us be at our most fluid and inspirational, we need to slow down. You can easily do this by setting an intention to relax, slowing down your breathing, and engaging your peripheral vision.

#Reality Check– get practical, draw on all your previous experiences of ‘making things happen’ and seeing projects through to the end, and decide what your goals or intentions for the year will be.

#Be Specific – the more specific you are the better, this will help with all of the following steps. So you will be wanting, dates, colours, locations, people and all manner of details ready for your goal. It’s important. Make it real and make it personal to you.

#Understand the Power of the Inner Experience

Step in to the future, to already having achieved your goal. Now notice how you feel inside from having done it already. Notice your external environment, people, settings, notice how you look, and really get in touch with your inner experience of this, feeling how good it feels. Your brain will be forming neural connections for you, which will already be aligning you with this future by helping you to form a sort of ‘perceptual filter’ through which to take in messages. Most important of all is this inner experience of emotion.
This will be some sort of positive feeling; maybe pride, satisfaction, contentment, happiness, joy, confidence. Whatever it is, really make a note of it because this is what you are going to be motivated TOWARDS. Using this emotion will help you to express what you WANT in POSITIVE language. Most of the time, left to our own devices, we talk about our goals and futures by telling ourselves and others about what we DON’T want or about some PROBLEM we are trying to solve…..eg, get out of debt, stop feeling anxious, get away from an ex, move on from a bullying boss etc.

When we express ourselves in this language we are setting off all those neural pathways in our brains and bodies associated with the problem, and we are also triggering our emotional response to that problem too eg, fear, frustration, anger, sadness. OK it may be a diluted response, but still we are sending it to every cell of our bodies, and because emotions have a molecular structure, they also have a vibration. If we vibrate negative emotion we attract it back in, just like a human tuning fork, we resonate with other negative vibrations. Now this might all sound a little ‘woo woo’, but actually it’s science, back to my previous mention of Albert Einstein, who put it like this:

“Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy, this is physics.”

So there you have it. Connect with the POSITIVE EMOTION that reaching your goal will bring you. And immerse yourself in that emotion as often as you can.

Put another way, if you are feeling sad, lonely, fearful and desperate to reach your goal – all you will send out energetically is that negative emotion, and it is highly unlikely you will align yourself with your positive future.

As Albert puts it, you have to match the frequency of what you want FIRST, in order to achieve more of it. THIS IS THE DIFFERENCE WHICH MAKES THE DIFFERENCE TO YOUR SUCCESS STRATEGY, and it’s the key to all Coaching & Therapy.

You have to begin feeling good, OK and positive BEFORE you reach your goal, and each step of the way as you take your actions to reach your goal.

If you are relying on reaching your goal as your only way to feel OK, you will find the path to success much slower and bumpier ( this is where professional help can come in very handy, as some people do need to work through their negative emotion before they can really begin to make progress )

#Say it out Loud – summarise the specifics of your goal, and how you WANT TO FEEL – and say it out loud. When we use language and speak ( out loud, or in your head ) we light up specific neural pathways in our brains, the more positive neural pathways we light up in connection to what we want, the more solid the foundations we are laying, and the more familiar our brains become with what we want, and the more branches of other positive pathways are likely to spread out across our brains.

The good news is that our brains are plastic, the term ‘neural plasticity’ explains how new neural connections are made as our brains learn. With the right information and intentions, we can feed our brains, we can mold and shape them in new directions, away from old stuck patterns and into new territory.

#Write it Down – same principle, different pathways – writing down information lights up different areas of the brain.

#Build a Dream Board – get visual – same principle, different pathways – visualising lights up different areas of the brain, and is one of the most powerful ways to fire together new neurons in the brain, so that they wire together. Putting lots of images and key words together in a board can help you to keep reminding yourself of the visual information and connecting up with your goal in a way which will change your brain.

#Chunk it Down – to reduce a potential sense of overwhelm that can come from having lots to do, chunk down your steps into bite size and achievable chunks which are set against REALISTIC timescales. The last thing you want to do is be beating yourself up for not having enough time! Diarise what you are doing, it can help to use a colourful, wall planner which again appeals to the very powerful visual senses which are equally useful when planning as they are when imagining.

#Find an Accountability Partner – tell someone else your plans, and ask them to hold you accountable, to check in on you. Give them key dates when you will be doing certain things and give them permission to chase you on where you are up to. Accountability makes us much more likely to meet our deadlines. We only have to compare our productivity and focus at work with our bosses and line managers with the way we are at home to know that!

#Be Flexible – I’m all for having a strategy, for formalising steps and actions and being specific about goals and outcomes. However, in the spirit of connecting up with positive emotion, of matching the frequency of what we want ( back to Albert ) and of communicating useful energy to our selves, our cells, to others, and to the universe at large – I would encourage a sense of fluidity and flexibility in every approach.

Firstly, if you are not working with a professional coach or therapist – setting rigid goals and action plans can tend to pile on the pressure and have you stressed out, tired and stumbling around in clouds of brain fog. Fact: Stress fogs your brain and switches off your clever, creative and resourceful functioning!

So remember, it’s all about ‘Progress NOT Perfection’. Always find time and ways to de-stress to cultivate your most powerful inner platform to succeed.

Secondly, through staying fluid and flexible, we might actually find we start to get drawn towards another, even more brilliant and suitable route than the one we had planned. When we stay relaxed open and positive we can begin to attract and engineer all kinds of amazing opportunities, possibly quite different to what we had in mind at the start of they year.

I hope you enjoy the process, and your year ahead, and make a note to be to be kind to yourself along the way. You now understand both the power of positive emotion, the huge part it plays in successful living AND you appreciate the mechanics of how those toxic negative emotions really will slow your success down!

To view a FREE VIDEO INTRODUCTION to a ‘Daily Meditation, Relaxation & Self Coaching Programme’ called SHINE, to help you succeed and thrive in your year ahead – click here: SHINE FREE VIDEO

Lisa Bardell is an Executive Coach, Life Coach, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Accredited Meditation Coach and Creator of SHINE Meditation. She runs private Coaching Practices in Central London and Cheshire, Corporate Coaching Programmes for businesses in Manchester and London, regular Meditation Workshops in the UK and Transformational Retreats in Ibiza and Bordeaux. More information can be found on her website: LisaBardellCoaching.co.uk

 

What predicts a successful life?

What is a successful and satisfying life?

We all have our own opinions on what makes someone’s life look like a success from where we see it. But there is a simple definition of a successful life which I like to use, because many people who look like they have it all, are still not happy, not satisfied and do no feel good enough or successful on the inside ( in fact a lot of the time this inner sense of lack is what keeps driving some people to achieve more ). So let’s keep it simple:

  • “A successful life is one which is ENJOYED by the person who lives it”

image

How do we get to ENJOY our lives?

Good question – this is something I work on all the time with clients, many of them extremely ‘successful’ yet deeply unhappy.

One of the UK’s foremost ‘happiness’ experts, Professor Richard Layard and his team, have been asking themselves the same question. What factors lead some people to a predisposition to feel happy, satisfied with their lot, and to enjoy an inner sense of success as an adult?

After investigating the factors in a person’s life that can best predict whether they will lead satisfied lives, a team headed by, has come up with an answer that may prove controversial. Any parents reading this may want to take note.

Layard and his colleagues at the Wellbeing research programme at the London School of Economics conclude that a child’s emotional health is far more important to their satisfaction levels as an adult than other factors, such as if they achieve academic success when young, or wealth when older. The authors explain that evaluating the quality of a child’s emotional health is based on analysing a range of internal factors in a person’s early life, including whether they endured unhappiness, sleeplessness, eating disorders, bedwetting, fearfulness or tiredness.

The academics claim that their study, What Predicts a Successful Life? A Life-course Model of Well-being, published in the latest edition of the Economic Journal, offers “a completely new perspective on which factors contribute most to a satisfying life”. The study claims to challenge “the basic assumption of educational policy in recent years – that academic achievement matters more than anything else”. This claim appears to be an implicit criticism of former education secretary Michael Gove, who instructed schools not to focus on “peripheral” issues such as children’s moral, social and cultural development in favour of academic excellence. Gove’s successor, Nicky Morgan, has pledged to reverse this approach.

Many people have assumed income is the most important factor in an adult’s life satisfaction. But the academics say their data makes clear this is far less important than emotional health – both in a child and in an adult. “Income only explains about 1% of the variation in life satisfaction among people in the UK – one sixth of the fraction explained by emotional health,” they note.

Money really can’t buy you happiness…

The findings might be controversial, giving some measurable evidence that education and income are among the least important determinants of adult success, as measured by life satisfaction!

It’s interesting and welcome ( in my opinion ) that the economics of happiness or wellbeing is now a growing and respected discipline within economics that is starting to influence politicians.

David Cameron has even reportedly stated: “It’s time we admitted that there’s more to life than money and it’s time we focused not just on GDP but on GWB – general well-being.”

Imagine the effect of a nation of much more content as satisfied people….I wonder how much less we would spend trying to make ourselves look better, feel better or escape our stresses?….

Neither can academic achievement!

The report boldly concludes:

  • “We find that the intellectual performance of a child is the least important childhood predictor of life-satisfaction as an adult.”

Well the good news is, if your childhood has already happened, and if your adulthood has been plagued by feeling unhappy, fearful, dissatisfied or stuck – the brain is very good at re-wiring, with the right guidance, no matter what your background or childhood history. All is not lost!

Read my client testimonials here:

http://lisabardellcoaching.co.uk/success-stories/

Learn Mind Calm Modern Meditation with me, for Serenity and Success:

http://lisabardellcoaching.co.uk/meditation/

There’s more to Weight Loss than Willpower…

Weight Loss Secrets

What is the key to successful and sustainable weight loss? Most of my clients who want to work with me to lose weight, to change their eating habits, or to resolve a relationship with food which feels completely out of control, ask for more willpower. That is what they believe they truly need, and a good dose of extra willpower will sort out all their food, eating and therefore weight issues. So is that it? Is weight gain, over-eating and bingeing all a simple matter of being weak willed? Well, there is more to it than that. Willpower – or resisting that which is it hard to say NO to –  is NOT the only focus during therapy courses to help with weight loss, or to remedy poor eating habits. Willpower is only ever a temporary strategy which fatigues like a muscle…

image

Let’s look at the bigger picture when it comes to really working successfully with clients who want to lose weight, and keep it off. Enlisting the help of a hypnotherapist can be the difference that really makes the difference for many clients, after years of weight gain, and very limited success at losing weight which then just seems to pile back on faster than ever. If you are reading because this resonates with you, it’s likely that some of the below will be familiar:

  • A sense of ongoing struggle to lose weight and keep it off.
  • Food cravings, constant thoughts of food, diet, figure.
  • Overeating, not controlling portions, not knowing when you are full, or eating when you know you are full.
  • Eating to feel better in times of stress or emotional strain, using food as a treat or reward.
  • No energy or motivation to exercise.
  • Poor body image – feeling unattractive, withdrawn, depressed about your weight.
  • Feeling stressed and managing a stressful life, juggling and keeping people happy.

The effect of stress

Firstly let’s look at the role of stress and negative emotion in weight gain. The talk of stress has become part of everyday life for many of us. There are many ways to work on managing stress, and resolving negative emotions, but this is particularly important in relation to clients who struggle to lose weight and keep it off, because stress effects the physiology of our whole body and plays havoc with our metabolism and appetite. The effect of stress on our systems creates all the wrong conditions for weight loss and emotional well-being. In fact instead it leads us to hold on to calories or gain weight. The more stressed you are about your life, relationships or your work, the more difficult it will be to lose weight, and the more negative emotion you will need to ‘soothe and comfort’ with food. Ironically the more stressed and upset you are about your weight and your body, the more you are likely to hold on to weight and slow your metabolism down.

The stress hormone cortisol causes fatigue in the adrenal glands, which is likely to lead to

  • Cravings.
  • Increased appetite.
  • Irregular appetite.
  • Fatigue and poor sleep.
  • Slow metabolism.
  • Weight gain around the middle and abdomen.

When working with my clients who want to lose weight and change a dysfunctional relationship with food, we always work on resolving the stress and the negative emotion FIRST. The first port of call for all clieats is to help them feel OK, positive and resourceful,  just as they are. The more a client depends and ‘needs’ weight loss or any change in their body or their lives, as their ONLY way to feel good – the more they get locked into patterns of downward spiralling emotion and despair, which is painful and fuels the very problems they are trying to fix. 

Some people choose to comfort or soothe pain with alcohol, some choose exercise, some gambling, some sex or sexual attention, some spend lots of money, some book facials, treatments or spa weekends. We all tend to have our own range of go-to strategies to pick us up when we feel down – with clients who binge or overeat, food has become their strategy.

The science of weight loss therapy

Neural-plasticity is the term we use to explain the brain’s natural ability to change and make new connections and pathways. It explains how people are able to make extraordinary changes in the way they think, feel and behave after therapy.

If we allow the brain to be in a different, specific state, it learns that state, and finds it much easier to get back to it again through the pathways which have already been created.

Hypnosis, NLP and EFT collapse any old neural pathways in the brain which are behind the old thoughts, feelings and behaviour patterns towards food, eating and health. In turn through specific techniques and skilful language patterns, the skilled therapist will guide each client to form new pathways and patterns in the brain which are in line with all the changes they want, the changes that are going to make a sustainable difference to their weight, health and emotional comfort.

Willpower and the brain

During client sessions I focus on the three components of willpower, which correspond with three different areas of the brain within the pre-frontal cortex, which is found just behind the forehead.

  • Right side – “I WON’T” – This area is responsible for our ability to stop doing something, which is not useful or in line with our goals. You can fill in the gaps here with your own story!
  • Left side – “I WILL” – This area is responsible for our ability to find motivation to do something, stick at it, stay on track even when it gets a bit tough, boring or inconvenient. I will leave these examples to your imagination…( who mentioned ‘treadmill’?)
  • Underneath – “I WANT” – This area is responsible for our ability to have a really clear idea of what we want, what the point is, the bigger picture, why our goals are so important to us. This area keeps us in touch with remembering what we care about most…Health. Comfort. Vitality. Longevity. Wardrobe options. Feeling great about ourselves and our bodies! This is a very important area to work on.

With all of these lines of communication in the brain strengthened both inside and between each specific area, can you already see how that old idea of needing strong willpower becomes less of an issue?

With these brain changes in place, it naturally becomes easier to make good intentional choices.

Willpower implies that there is a constant and challenging struggle, that staying on track is going to be hard, a battle we must be strong to win. Is this what it’s all about? Thankfully not! Once the root cause issues are fully resolved, the old patterns and dependancies ( whatever they are ) just fall away, like a layer of skin ready to shed – like something which is no longer needed, which no longer fits.

Success and sustainable change is simply a matter of therapeutically re-wiring our unconscious patterns and neural pathways in a new and more useful way. A way that is aligned with the “I want”. That is what Hypnosis, NLP and EFT are so brilliant at helping with – getting into those deeper layers of the unconscious or subconscious programming, and influencing change where it is needed.

If you are undecided whether to invest in the help of an expert practitioner to tackle your goals, here are some great tips for you tackling it alone:

Before you begin taking action to lose weight, apply yourself to this exercise in full in preparation to do it more easily

  • Really identify what you want in detail, get in touch with it – The “I WANT”
  • Express that in positives, so it really is about what you want e.g., health, freedom to make healthy choices, fitness, comfort in my clothes, wardrobe and style choices, energy, focuS.
  • AVOID negative language, even if it is internal chatter, is activating the most unhelpful neural pathways in your brain for the job in hand. The power of words and language is immense, so choose it wisely to activate helpful neurology!
  • What will achieving your goals give you – in positives.
  • How will it feel – How will you look – What will people say to you – What will you be saying to yourself?
  • Have reminders of your goal around if that helps – photos, outfits, holidays, wedding dates – whatever makes it real and keeps it in your awareness
  • Buddy up and have support from others  – but keep the talk positive!
  • Plan and organize – shopping, schedules, recipes, Tupperware…think ahead so you create healthy choices for yourself and avoid getting hungry – that’s when the internal saboteur kicks in.
  • How do you need to be feeling, what states are most useful? Confident, focussed, motivated, calm, positive?
  • Choose a couple of useful emotional states and IMMERSE yourself in them, by remembering times when you felt like that before. See, hear, feel – get fully in touch with the emotion, and allow your brain to just naturally make these connections.
  • The brain doesn’t know the difference between imagining yourself in to a positive emotional state, or whether it arrived organically – YOUR BRAIN DOES NOT CARE!! It fires together all the confident, calm, positive neurons, and they then wire together – just like re-wiring your brain for success. Clever eh?

Some practical tips

  • Practice simple paced breathing before eating (or any time you want to relax)  or during cravings – If you focus your attention on taking deep slow breaths, and allow your out-breath to be longer than your in-breath ( in for the count of 5/6 out for the count of 7/8 ) The vagus nerve responds by putting the body into the ‘relaxation response’ which allows you better digestion, faster metabolic rate, better decision making to have your actions around food fully aligned with your goals.
  • Mindful eating  – Enjoy the sight and the smell of your food. Enjoy each mouthful slowly, savouring the taste and texture. Eat slowly, taking breaks to put your cutlery down, stay in touch with the signals from your gut which tell your brain you are full and satisfied.
  • Allow you brain and body time and space to ENJOY and take PLEASURE from food.

 

If you would like to read more about me, or my Specialist Weight Loss & Disordered Eating Therapy, the link below might be of interest. I work one to one from my private clinics in Cheshire and London, or over Skype.

http://lisabardellcoaching.co.uk/weight-loss/ 

Build your wings on the way down…The power of intention

Sometimes in life we just have to jump and build our wings on the way down….

What does this mean? Well we can get stuck in a rut, or even frozen by ‘analysis paralysis’ when we put off making a decision, taking action, making changes or moving on…..And WHY do we do this? We convince ourselves that the perfect moment, circumstances or environment will be just around the corner, and THEN we will make our move.

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If this is a regular pattern for you, the chances are you won’t ever take the actions and you will get locked into a cycle of waiting for the right moment, only for it to pass you by altogether.

The power of intention

There’s a lot to be said for making a commitment, for sending a CLEAR intention out into the universe….In my experience if you boldly go, the universe catches you and throws some support your way to boot.

Once you are broadcasting out the energy of what you want, once you are radiating out what you want to be, you do actually start aligning yourself with that future – consciously and unconsciously – you begin to get stuff done, take opportunities, create opportunities and notice what can help you by seeing the world through a slightly different filter.

David Hamilton PhD is an ex lead scientist from AstraZeneca, one of the largest pharmaceutical companies in the world, he spent years creating drugs for cancer and heart disease, and he became intrigued by the ‘placebo effect’ – the power of subconscious belief to produce healing in the body through administering an inert sugar pill in drug trials. David then left to research mind-body science and become an author and world famous speaker. He has written a brilliant book called ‘Is Your Life Mapped Out’, which explores and explains the quantum physics theories of energy and information, and the sophisticated ways which we communicate with others, with our environment and the universe at large. There is science to the Power of Intention!

So, if there’s something you’re sitting on or dithering over…Just do it. Take action. Jump and allow the universe to catch you!

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Overwhelmed at Work? 9 Tips for Taking Back Control

We’ve all been there….The e-mails keeping pinging in, the to-do list becomes a whole notebook, people need deadlines met, and you just don’t know where to start!

Getting overwhelmed in busy and demanding working environments is a very common problem, and one which can be easily resolved with a coach. No matter how impossible or Herculean your tasks may seem.

RESPONSE

If you are tackling this issue without a practitioner, here are some useful and practical tips you can take to get a new perspective and restore clarity to take action.

  • Switch off your Computer and your phone, at least for an hour or two, to allow yourself to re-focus and take a step back.
  • Review your boundaries and say NO. Practice saying no or giving realistic timescales to ease the sense of time pressure and give yourself  some space to think.  Autopilot ‘people pleasing’ creates unnecessary stress, but is a habit that can be easily changed.
  • Cancel and reschedule. Have your diary working for you, not against you.
  • Take action. With your head in a better space, pull out what needs attention right now and commit to doing it. Having your list and your head free of these points will ease that previous sense of pressure even further.
  • Brain rehearse. Get you and your brain into ‘useful’ states, remember and re-live times when you were calm, resourceful, tenacious, got great feedback. Review all your successes and strengths. Do this regularly! Your brain doesn’t know the difference in you ‘imagining and remembering’,  or actually doing,  it complies by activating powerful neurological pathways in your brain which help you get into the right state of mind for the job.
  • Set realistic goals. Connect with your exciting future and progression by setting long term goals, with actions which can be ‘chunked down’ into small achievable steps. Be realistic about what is involved and how long things take to avoid over committing with a fear of under delivering.
  • Plan something fun or relaxing. Nothing to do with work, something for you or the family that will bring you joy and have you absorbed in the moment, or relaxed and calm.
  • Breathe! I mean really breathe……..If you get into a routine of practicing ‘paced breathing’ at regular intervals throughout the day ( preferably away from your desk ), just a few minutes of deep slow breathing, with the out breath a couple of counts LONGER than the in-breath, as if my magic your vagus nerve will respond by putting your body into a mini ‘relaxation response’ the physiological antidote to the ‘stress response’. The focus and attention also acts like a mini meditation practice, and has you in the present moment, focused on your body, rather than up in your head focused on thoughts.
  • Remember we ‘create’ stress. Aside from getting us out of the way of real threat and danger ( which let’s face it is very rare in day to day life! ) we actually create our stress by our thoughts, and then our thoughts trigger the sympathetic nervous system to respond to ‘imagined’ threat, in same way as if we were escaping a wild lion. We do have a choice in how we respond to ‘stressors’. And if we practice being ‘aware’ when we are racing off into unproductive thinking, which might involve catastrophising what might happen, or dwelling on what already has happened – we can bring ourselves back to the present moment, and recover our calm and focus.

If you would like some help, contact me via the website contact page I would highly recommend you also take a look at my Mind Calm ‘Workshops’ page, and click through to Eventbrite to secure your place on one of the transformational workshops across the UK.

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12 Habits of Emotionally Resourceful People

What is it that allows some people to bounce back, and to remain resourceful, positive and inspired despite the chaos of their circumstances or the stress of those around them?

Have you ever wondered how some people just seem to…..

  • Be able to operate in a happy, confident and resourceful way, even when all around them are having an emotional meltdown?
  • Come across as positive and optimistic whilst still living in the real world and facing into the challenges of life?
  • Be highly effective and attract in more of what they want from life?

We might call these people ‘emotionally resourceful’. If we study their habits and strategies, we can learn a lot. Here are some useful habits to adopt if you feel yourself getting bogged down or stuck in a negative cycle.

resourseful

By beginning to take a new perspective, and to consciously adopt some of these habits for yourself, you may be pleasantly surprised at how quickly you notice changes in your own life.

  • 1. Take responsibility – Emotionally resourceful people don’t mope around feeling sorry for themselves, moaning about how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair, that sometimes they have to accept what they cannot change. We create stress by giving too much focus to what cannot be changed, to what ‘just is’.
  • 2. Understand you have a choice in how you respond – Resourceful individuals don’t have the impression that their emotional experience is controlled by the actions or words of other people. If you notice their language, it will not be passive or in ‘victim mode’ ….eg “My boyfriend takes away my confidence”. They understand that they have control over their own emotions and a choice in how they respond to external events.
  • 3. Embrace change – By welcoming change and being willing to be flexible, we can understand that change is inevitable and believe in our abilities to adapt and to learn life lessons from whatever the universe puts in our path.
  • 4. Choose what gets your attention – We feel what we focus on!! By giving the lost luggage, traffic jams or the annoying colleague our attention we encourage our feelings of anger, frustration or upset. Instead, an emotionally resourceful person will focus on what they can control in their lives. They also recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can really be in command of is their attitude and response to a situation.
  • 5. Be OK with people not liking you – Resourceful types recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. Whilst setting a clear intention to be kind and fair, they accept other people being upset and are able to form healthy boundaries in relationships which work for them rather than having them feeling used and trampled by the neediness of others.
  • 6. Take risks – Resourceful people are playful, and they realize life is an ongoing experiment from which we can keep learning lessons. When we lose our ‘over-attachment’ to ‘getting it right’, we free ourselves up from that old paralyzing analysis of what might go wrong. By taking risks, we take more action. By taking action we learn more and make more impact on our lives and others.
  • 7. Live in the present – The present is the only moment that you can experience anything directly. The mind, where we do our thinking, is only a ‘thinking about’ tool. By dwelling on past regrets or mistakes, or predicting the future, we sometimes become lost in thinking, and one step removed from the present moment. Emotionally resourceful people show up in the moment, take it in through their senses, and take part. Through showing up for the full experience of the present moment, we also remember and recall more.
  • 8. Do something different – If emotionally resourceful people are not getting the results they want, they dare to take a new action…”If you keep on doing what you’ve been doing – you will keep getting what you’ve been getting”. By accepting responsibility for our behavior and learning from past mistakes, we are less likely to keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead we can move on more freely and make better decisions and choices in the future.
  • 9. Teach people how to treat you – The resourceful person will teach others how to treat them. We are unconsciously teaching people how to treat us all the time – through what we stop, what we allow and what we reinforce. We can begin to be more conscious and intentional with what we are stopping and allowing, and gradually we form new dynamics and healthy boundaries with those around us.
  • 10. Know there’s no such thing as failure – What is failure? Look at all those examples of highly successful people who ‘failed’ many, many times before they hit their formula for success. Resourceful people do not view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use what some might term ‘failure’ as simply feedback.  Through allowing and accepting feedback in all it’s forms, we can expand our opportunities to learn, grow and improve. We can adopt a more innocent approach from which we continue to have ideas, make plans and take actions until we find our groove and our own personal recipe for success.
  • 11. Enjoy your own company – Resourceful people are just as happy alone as they are with a group. They embrace silence and stillness and use downtime to be productive. By enjoying our own company, we are less dependent on the companionship and entertainment from others to ‘make’ us feel good. Instead we become emotionally self-sufficient and independent.
  • 12. Know the world doesn’t owe you a favour – Emotionally resourceful people don’t feel entitled to things in life, they don’t adopt that mentality that others should take care of them or that the world owes them. If we begin looking for opportunities based on our own merits we can feel perfectly OK and satisfied with less expectation of others. This can free us up from eternal frustration and disappointment.

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